google-site-verification: googleae9556121f128741.html Healing Meditations: Creating Authentic Self Esteem: Step 2- Present Moment Worthiness

Monday, June 10, 2013

Creating Authentic Self Esteem: Step 2- Present Moment Worthiness

Present Moment Worthiness is the practice of acknowledging, celebrating and honoring the things we do everyday that are life affirming for ourselves and others. Sue Schmidt Hypnotherapist Louisville CO
Normally, we experience a boost in  self esteem when we receive an award, a promotion, fall in love or accomplish anything “big”.  All though these big moments are wonderful, for most of us, they are few and far between. Most of our lives are made up of many small moments. When we receive a big reward, dopamine, a neurotransmitter that signals pleasure and reward, floods our body  and we feel very good! Then, as the event ends there may be  flat feeling as dopamine  leaves our bodies. We’ve all experienced the dopamine high of accomplishing something big,   but  sooner or later,  we are doing the laundry, taking the kids to school and driving to the office. There is more work ahead and once again we are just with ourselves in our life as it is.images
So how do we keep a keep a steady stream of feel good dopamine flowing? We do this by creating a practice of acknowledging ourselves as worthwhile, good and fulfilled each and every day. 
Unfortunately, we may have a physiological bias against doing this. Primitive man evolved to pay attention to, and remember ,negative experiences more than positive ones. This bias toward negativity had an evolutionary advantage. Primitive man could afford to ignore  a beautiful sunset and perhaps live another day. But ignore the snap of a twig in the jungle signaling the approach of a predator and he may never get to pass on his genes. So in a very real way we are hard wired to remember our failures more than our successes. Thats why our successes need to be BIG to penetrate our conscious awareness. Rick Hanson, author of “Buddha’s Brain” says, “ In effect, the brain is like Velcro for negative experiences, but Teflon for positive ones. That shades “implicit memory” – your underlying expectations, beliefs, action strategies, and mood – in an increasingly negative direction.”
So we need to make a conscious decision to see the good in ourselves reflected in our everyday actions and accomplishments.download
Here’s How:
1. Journal: At the end of the day, before sleep, write down all the things that went well that day. Some examples could be:- I exercised and enjoyed it
-I was kind to a co worker.- I learned something new- I got to work on time- I fixed something-I enjoyed my drive to work-I was patient with my kids at least once today.The list could be and is endless. Reviewing this list before bed will help you  fall asleep and have positive dreams. 
2. Take in compliments.  When a co worker tells you you  look nice, take in a deep breath and really take it in. When you receive any kind of positive feedback don’t push it away. Drink it in.  Breathe and allow yourself to feel this positive feedback.  Many of us were taught at a very young age to push away positive feedback and feel uncomfortable with compliments. We were taught that it wasn’t good to think  well of ourselves. The underlying subconscious belief transmitted  is that if we are satisfied with who we are and what we do, we’ll become lazy or egotistical. In fact, the opposite is true. People work harder and better when the feel good about themselves.
3. Be Mindful: As you move through your day, notice the things you do well and mentally compliment yourself. You can put up sticky notes, or stickers, or a computer screen saver that says “Appreciate!” and take a moment to really appreciate yourself. Tell yourself positive things. Most of us will automatically focus and analyze endlessly all the things we should have done, or should have  done better, or all the ways we fell short. It is good to briefly acknowledge our weaknesses and create strategies to  improve and learn. But once we do that, we need to  tell ourselves at least 5 things that we did well or even just enjoyed. We can focus less on what we do, and more on how we have managed to be happy and have a good attitude. We can feel good about ourselves for noticing beauty. We can  even compliment ourselves for trying to find good things about ourselves!
The highest accomplishment any of us can hope for is to be a happy. This happiness spreads effortlessly outward to anyone we come into contact with like the ripples in a pond. And happiness, like any emotion is contagious. As we see the good in ourselves, we see the good in others. We become less judgmental,  more positive and our light spreads out into the world. As we feel “good enough” so do the people around us. And the pain, aggression and judgement that exists in our world  becomes lighter and more infused with love.
Try this: For one day, make a commitment to only say good things about you , to you in your own mind. See how you feel and let me know!
Warmly, 
Sue Schmidt C.Ht, CMT
Sue Schmidt, Meditations for Relaxation and Healing Louisville,  Co
Sue Schmidt, Meditations for Relaxation and Healing
Louisville, Co